To my daddy on Fathers Day,
You have been gone from this life for so many years, but it only seems like such a short time ago you were here. Has it really been 22 years since you were called home? And your wife has been with you almost 16 years.
I miss you, there are times when I feel you ever so close, and the occasional dreams. I wish I could have those dreams far more often, because they are so very real.
Rather than go into all the things I wish could have been, I like to focus on the things that were and are. You left behind quite a family, for only having one boy and one girl. You have 8 grandchildren, 17 great-grandchildren and five step great great grandchildren. Children were the light of your life, you said you had hoped you lived long enough to have great grandchildren and you did. You were able to welcome quite a few of them here! You had already gone on when you brought back your great-grandson, Chris. I took a lot of comfort knowing you were there to take care of him and love him.
I so appreciate your teaching me the values of life, how you were the richest man on earth because you had your wonderful wife, and two kids. And you really meant it when you said it. You know dad, I don’t think there are many on this earth today that “really” feel that way. So many today would trade most anything for fame and fortune. I found out the meaning of patience and long suffering from you. You had such an extreme case of arthritis in your body. Seldom did you complain – most of your complaints were due to the restrictions it put on you. You couldn’t even hold a fork to feed yourself, you fashioned a special one just for that purpose. I read in your journal now how you had so many days that you couldn’t get out and around until afternoon because of the soreness of the joints. Odd, I don’t remember that.
How I loved sitting on your lap, in the rocking chair, by that big radio, listening to Fibber McGee and Molly – or to the Friday Night Fights I think it was! And the electric storms that would come through at night and you gathering up your family and making us all go out to the car to wait it out! Wonder if that was because of the couple times we had a “lightening ball” go through the kitchen window and explode in the living room? Or maybe because you found out that lightening could and did – strike in the same place twice?!! Or was it because of the time the lightening kicked my brother in the butt and threw him off the front porch leaving him dazed?! As a young child, I just took it all in stride I guess. Not knowing that these things were not normal??! I have often wondered if that ground there had a special attraction to lightening…
I love the fact that you loved farming, that you loved the soil, and tending and taking care of the earth. You took such pride in keeping nature as it should be. You were way before your time! You probably went broke because you didn’t want to impact the earth too much, which was opposite of the thinking of that time. Now I go over to the valley and stand in amazement at the way farming is today. You would not have been at all happy with the methods of today and certainly not all the circle irrigation!
I appreciate your taking care of my mother for all those years. I never dreamed how hard it must have been at times. You know she had some type of chemical imbalance, which I was never able to find anyone who could help her. I appreciate that you loved her, adored her, and would have done most anything for her. I appreciate that you sacrificed so much for her and for me. Through the worst of times, your NOT doing all you could was not even a consideration. I remember asking you once if you ever went through a “mid-life crisis” as so many men seem to do today. You said you felt that was all a bunch of rubbish. You said you thought the men today just have too much time on their hands to worry about themselves and was nothing more than selfishness.
I appreciate that even at the age of 41, you wanted to adopt a child and again at the age of 45. I know if you would have been in your 20’s, I would have had you many more years, but I also know that wasn’t the plan. In January of 1949, one of your neighbors had to make a trip to Denver and asked if you, your wife and your son would like to go along. You did, and while up there stopped by the Home for Dependent Children to see how far down on the list you were. When you stopped in, you then found out that as of that day, there was a girl you could take home with you if you wanted! This baby had just returned from Children’s Hospital because of “failure to thrive” problems. This must have been the early part of January, because my biological mother signed away her rights on YOUR birthday, Jan.7th! You know you always encouraged us to try to find our biological mothers, you always wanted to tell them thank you. You know I found mine, and was able to relay that message to her from you! Now as time goes on, she also has passed and I have tried to repay her by having her work done in the temple of our Lord. She wanted that. She asked me one time why I had contact with her, she had nothing to give me – I told her she had already given me the greatest gift one person could give another. She looked at me and said what?? I said to her “Life”. I don’t think she really understood that!! Perhaps now she does.
I am so thankful that back in 1955 and 1956, you listened to Elder and Sister Chard from Utah. I thank you for building your testimony of the Lords Gospel, of living his gospel. I thank you for that example for so many. I thank you for being patient with me, I don’t understand how you could have been so patient, but I thank you! I always knew the gospel meant a lot to me, but not until I actually faced death and stepped over that threshold did I really understand what it’s all for. I thank you for all the work you continue to do – I know you are very busy where you are now. I hope when my time comes to meet you, you can take a few days off to spend just with me!!
So daddy, as this year passes, I still miss you as much now as ever. I miss your wisdom and your stead-fastness. I miss your chewing on whole cloves before church every Sunday!! I miss cutting your hair every month or so. I miss our quiet times on those special Saturday mornings! You and I, before my family woke up and you, before my mom woke up! You would sneak out of the house and come over to my house where we would sit and talk for as long as you dared be gone! I thank you for that special gift of coming over one Saturday morning and saying if I was going to interview you on tape, we probably should get it done. Did you know that almost 3-months to the day – you would be gone?
Oh, this particular print is for you dad, you had such beautiful handwriting and took pride in good penmanship. The hours I spent in practice!! Now my computer does it all for me, and I can type so much faster than I ever wrote!
Until then. . .
